Standing Tall For What You Believe in

Have you ever sat with a group of people who are talking about an issue you feel strongly about and one where it feels like they are a little ignorant of it (for one reason or another) and you want to chime in…but you don’t? If it were your friends that would be a different story, right? A group of strangers however…i’m not so sure. I personally feel I’d have to suss them out first (I’m not good with conflict, and lord knows how someone would react) Now imagine you’re on TV, and the person you want to interrupt is a guest from another department/segment of the show. Well, this exactly what GMB weatherman Alex Beresford did, and for that, he deserves some love.

Despite growing up in a rough part of West Yorkshire (where racial tension was, and still is, high) I can’t compare my childhood to his. That’s not what this is about. What I can relate to, however, is parenthood.

As a parent of a 6-year-old and a 9-month-old, it is my job to make sure they are respectable members of society, and that they stand tall for what they believe in. For someone like myself who suffers from anxiety and is super socially awkward…it’s much easier said than done. I don’t feel comfortable doing it myself, so how can I instal it in them? It’s a tricky one, but it’s one of the many ‘joys’ of parenthood.

When Alex Beresford stood up and spoke out for what he believed in, which was something he grew up in and around, I personally didn’t see the argument of prison and knife crime, I saw a father lead by example and show his child/children (you’ll have to excuse my ignorance as to how many he is a father too) that you shouldn’t sit back while other people make decisions on things they know nothing about. If you see injustice, stand tall & let it be known.

So thank you, Alex, from one father to another, for giving me a little more confidence in being able to do the right thing for my children.

To Keith

I was 14 in 1997. That was the year I was first introduced to The Prodigy. I was sat watching TOTPs with my dad and Firestarter came on. I vividly remember being blown away by the visuals. I’d never seen anything like it before. Even my dad was left gobsmacked. The next day at school it’s all we spoke about. This was a true game changer when it came to music, and it opened up many doors for me.

I grew up in a very strict ‘no-nonsense’ household. My mum loved The Bay City Rollers, The Osmonds and Showaddywaddy, and my dad loved Joan Armatrading, Paul Simon and Otis Reading; heavy, angry, intense music was FAR from what we would listen to. So you can imagine the shock for them to see and hear this being played in the UK charts. I was at an age where I didn’t really like any music as such, but the imagery and intensity of Keith and The Prodigy lit a spark inside me that would stay hidden away until my late teens (when I finally felt able to express myself properly)

Their music and influence were with me throughout the whole of the 90s and 2000s, and they have influenced way more bands than I realised.

There is undeniable sadness to this situation, and I don’t wish to focus on his death or the reasons why etc so instead I think a celebration of their music is in order.

If you’re not familiar with The Lounge Kittens, then you will be after this. Three extremely talented ladies put together a Prodigy Melody Cover song that features all the hits mashed together to create one seriously glorious tune.

It’s ok to be sad at the loss of Keith, but celebrate all that he brought to the world too.

Joey

The Lounge Kittens

Films To Be Buried With Podcast

One of my favourite Podcasts to listen to is called Films to be Buried With in which artists, actors & musicians are asked film-related questions that tell the story of their life. It really is fascinating stuff, and that in part is down to the host Brett Goldstein. Obviously, the answers are more in-depth on the podcast and there is back and forth between guest and host…but I thought I’d give it a go myself. So sit back, relax and when you’ve finished reading mine, head on over to your favourite Podcast provider and give the real deal a listen to here.

What was the first ever film you saw?

My mum always told me she took me to see The Care Bears Movie when I was tiny…but I fell asleep during it apparently, and I certainly don’t remember seeing it (I would have been 2 years old) But what I do remember vividly (back when Dewsbury had a cinema) was going to see The Little Mermaid and Indian Jones. Based on the dates they where released, it would have been Indiana Jones. Though I definitely enjoy The Little Mermaid more, which says a lot about me.

What was the film that scared you the most?

Now, like most of these questions I think you have to take the time and your age into consideration (when answering them) I was 16 when The Blair Witch Project came out and I remember telling my dad that (I read in The Daily Mirror) audiences in America where running out of the cinema absolutely terrified because they didn’t know if it was real or not, and it was scary as hell. Guess what? it WAS scary as hell! That last scene (again, 16/17 years old) where he’s just stood against a wall and then she drops and the camera drops and continues to roll, and you STILL don’t know if it’s real or not. Terrifying!

What was the film that made you cry the most?

There is a long list of films for this (I’m not shy when it comes to expressing myself) but Inside Out just kills me. I don’t want my babies to grow up. I don’t want these magical days to end. It’s so beautiful and so sad…and it’s inevitable. Brilliant storytelling & a legitimate classic in my books.

What film is TERRIBLE but you love it?

Easy…Freddy Got Fingered! 18 years later and I STILL quote it! ‘got my fingers crossed! Hope I get a jobby’. It’s SO dumb and Tom Green is at his height of ridiculous, it’s just amazing. Even now in 2019. Well, at least I think so.

What is the film you once loved but watching it now you realise it’s terrible?

Another easy one (& ironically features Tom Green again!) Road Trip. I literally watched it at the end of last year and it’s just awful! It would not be made in 2019 that’s for sure! (Sexism being the key crime) it’s creepy, it’s not funny, it’s just awful.

What is the film that means the most to you? Not because of the film it’s self, but because of the memories, you have of it.

Tough one this, because a lot of my happy memories have been shattered. My wife and I had a Labyrinth ‘themed’ wedding as we are both huge Bowie fans (& that film is easily top 3 of all time) but sadly, we are no longer together.

What is the sexiest film?

Again, super easy because I was the perfect target audience at the time…American Pie 2. That lesbian scene…say no more! What’s interesting is, that film still holds up. I know I berated Road Trip for being sexist and dumb, but the writing & characters in this are way better written. It also plays both ways; if you remember the scene in question you’ll remember that the boys have to show that they are willing too, and in the end, Stifler becomes comfortable with his own sexuality. So as dumb and as sexist as it seems, it actually delving feeling into the characters (especially the men) & getting them to open up & question love, life and sexuality.

Which film do you most relate to?

Into the wild. It’s based on a true story in which Christopher McCandles just wants to escape the stress & BS of life. He wants to live off the grid, and just live alone in the middle of nowhere. It’s SUCH a good film, and the fact that it’s true (ending with an actual photo of him before he died) blows my mind. I suffer with anxiety and depression & intrusive thoughts, I know exactly what it feels like to want to disappear. If you haven’t seen it, go do so now. You won’t be disappointed.

Which film is objectively the greatest ever?

I think I’d say Shawshank Redemption. The story, characters, the vibe of the film…everything about it is just perfect. I’ve never met a single person who thinks it’s a crap film. Can’t say more than that really because I can’t think of anyone under the age of 20 who hasn’t seen it. It’s a masterpiece (especially when he is escaping to the ‘sound’ of thunder and lighting) a visually stunning film too.

Which film is the one you’ve watched the most?

Another easy one…Labyrinth. It was my childhood, my wedding was based on it and even Layla (my 6-year-old daughter) loves it. Never get tired of watching it or singing along. Most definitely the most watched by a country mile.

What’s the worst film you’ve ever seen?

A friend and I went to see the 2011 midnight release of Conan the Barbarian…dear lord almighty. Awful. What a letdown. There’s really not much else to say other than its well and truly forgettable.

(Finally) What is the film that’s literally made you laugh out loud the most?

It was a toss-up between Jackass and Bruno…but I have to give it to the latter. When he jumped out of the window after being whipped by a dominatrix…honest to god, I couldn’t breathe! It makes me laugh just thinking about it! So much cringe and shock. Amazing.

Massive props to Brett for creating such a wonderful show. Please go check it out for yourself, and maybe give some o your own answers in the comments.

Marvel Team-Up Starring Spider-man & Blade

Volume 1

Issue 7

March 1998

The Story

Peter Parker is in school trying to complete a chem paper that’s due in 3 hours. He falls asleep at his desk & is woken up by his good friend Jose, the janitor. After a brief conversation (letting us know that there is some history between the two of them) Jose continues with his duties. Little does he know there is a vampire, a sun walker, hiding in the shadows. The vampire kills Jose, & Spider-man is left angry (at himself for not being able to save his friend, and also at the vampire for the murder its self)

The two of them take the fight outside where Spidey eventually gets the win just as the police turn up. He webs the vampire up and heads on home. While this is going on Blade is in the shadow watching it all unfold. He was the one who was sent to take down this Vampire, unaware that Spidey was in the area. But seeing as how he was, Blade let him do his dirty work for him. The vampire is arrested & taken to Rikers Island, only for Blade to then break him out of there and torture him on a beach until he gives up some information (the vampire cannot be killed by the sun, but he feels the pain of it as if it were killing him)

…this is when things start to get interesting…

Just after the Vampire had been experimented on (scientists working with Blade were trying to figure out what makes him different to other vampires) it turns out that he (like Blade) also has some human emotions. He reveals that in Austria, 1794 Dracula himself turned this vampire into the undead! Before that, he was Henry Sage. He had a wife and kid and Dracula took them away from him before turning him into the vampire he is today. Blade starts to empathise with this (once) man and just as we think Blade is ready to save him, Spider-man comes crashing through the window to kick both their butts.

You see, day(s?) prior, after the funeral of Jose, there was a news report telling us that a vigilante (Blade) had broken a criminal out of Rikers Island. Spidey is watching this news report and recognises Blade. He remembers Dr Strange telling him that Blade is based in New Orleans. So in order to avenge Jose’s death, Spider-man travels to New Orleans to track down both Blade & this vampire, and once again set the world to right.

Blade and Spider-man begin to battle while Sage escapes. Blade talks some sense into Spidey and they go track Sage down. They realise that Sage (the Vampire) was sent to ESU (where Peter Parker studies) to steal a special compound that was created by the Dean of the ESUs science department (this compound is what makes a Vampire a Sun walker)

Blade and Spider-man track Sage down to a graveyard. The story ends when Sage has Spider-man pinned down, ready to feast on him (as strong as Spidey is, Sage holds Spidey down as if he ‘were a baby’) Blade tries to talk him out of it but Sage won’t listen. The need to feast is all consuming and in the end, Blade takes him out and kills him before he turns Spider-man into the undead. We find out that the formula lets them walk in the sun, but it also brings back some of their humanity too.

Verdict

Unsurprisingly, this was really good. I say unsurprisingly because…well its Blade and Spider-man! Two very awesome Marvel creations. The story is a little cheesy & dated at times (Peter Parker must reference The X-Files at least 3 times) and the initial conversation between Jose and Parker was clearly there to let us know the history between the two of them (making Spider-mans revenge justifiable) as well as having a final battle in a graveyard! but all in all, a great story and a very enjoyable read.

Poo Slime Royalty

Magic Moments

Having children brings you many wonderful moments in life. Yeah, they can be nightmarish at times and can make life stressful, but the good will always outweigh the bad. One of these wonderful moments (for me at least) is watching how my 6-year-old daughter learns, plays and grows with Youtube.

Back In My Day

Growing up, I had 4 channels. Channel 5 came along at the end of my teens, and we were too poor for Sky or cable. So we made do with what we had (which for me was a mixture of toys, stickers & cards, and video games) and life was good (well I enjoyed for the most part) now that I have children of my own I not only get an insight into what they like but also watching them react to things I liked at their age (check out my Detective Pikachu post for an example) and one of the hot ticket items of the moment, is slime.

Turtle Power

TMNT Retromutagen Ooze from 1989 was not only my first ‘exposure’ to slime…but it was also the best. Not only was it part of one I my all time favourite franchises (the TMNT) but it also came with a tiny glow in the dark pre-evolved turtle! It was amazing. Thinking about it now takes me straight back to shopping for it with my mum in Woolworths in Dewsbury (West Yorkshire) we had so many of those canisters growing up, they were an integral part of playing with our other toys. Fast forward 30 years later and my daughter is enjoying the exact same thing! Only this time, there’s a slight ‘twist’ to what she plays with.

They Play With What Now?

For whatever reason, (& it really is beyond me) children of today are OBSESSED with poo related toys. Seriously, it is EVERYWHERE. Some of the biggest play creation toy manufacturers in the world have poo related toys. Make your own poo, poo based board games, poo emoji cushions, you cannot escape it. It is everywhere. And the biggest ‘culprit’ of them all? Poo slime. That’s right, slime that is pretending to be the excrement of some magical mystical animal. I don’t get it, but it clearly works, so why not. The question is though…is it any good?

The Competition

The answer (I’ve found) is, yes! But only from one specific company. In my 36 years of living (& being a man child) I’ve played with my fair share of slime. Ecto-Plazm, Gak, Silly Putty and a whole host of knock-off brands, but there is one company out of all of these that has well and truly hit the nail on the head when it comes to branding, fun and slime consistency. That company is HGL.

A Plethora of Poo

Last weekend my daughter brought home a small tub of unicorn poo (yes, you read that correctly) the container of which is a couple of cms thick with the circumference being just a little smaller than the base of a coffee mug. Inside was this creamy white slime…full of glitter (her mind exploded when she saw it was glitter, but why wouldn’t it be, its unicorn poo) as soon a she got it out, hand to God, she had it with her all day. If she wasn’t playing with the other toys with it, she had it in her hand while she was watching TV, and fiddling around with it while she was reading to me. It did not leave he sight. When she eventually went to sleep, I finally got my hands on it (to see what all the fuss was about) and I was amazed at what I found.

The Testing

To get the full effect of it I placed it back in its tub for a bit to cool down and to reshape (she had been playing with it so much it was warm from her touch!) But when I did get my hands on it…my word, it was the real deal. The consistency is spot on; not too runny like a Mattel slime, and not to moldable like Silly Putty. They well and truly hit that sweet spot. The colour is mesmerizing (especially with the hint of glitter) the packaging and gimmick are cheesy but perfect for the target audience. It also plays well with other toys (I used an action figure and some lego and it didn’t leave any mess or residue behind) and when you put it all back in its little tub, it all folds back perfectly into a smooth ‘new’ consistency (after a while)

Final thoughts

If you’re buying slime for your children, ignore the fact that it’s ‘poo’ (I know some parents are put off by this, lord knows why, but some are) just buy this stuff. It’s a great price point (I paid £1 for each of these tubs, yes, I have my own now) and it will give your child hours of fun, with very minimal mess (as long as they are using it properly) it also works well as a relaxation tool too! I use mine all the time when I’m just sat watching TV. Open up your inner child. It’s way more fun than you imagine.

The Joe Rogan Experience; How to conduct an interview

Podlife

The vast amount of Podcasts I listen to are based on True Crimes or video games. I don’t know what it is, but the older I get the more I want to listen to True Crime stories. Slightly morbid? Maybe…but that’s a story for another day. The only relevant (as in ‘up to date’) show I listen to is The Joe Rogan Experience.

The Perfect Host

Joe Rogan is exactly what an interviewer should be; intelligent & articulate & informative. Not only that, but he sits down with all manner of people. From Travis Barker to Professor Brian Cox & everyone in between. This diverse mixture of guests is one of the many factors of why he’s such a pleasure to listen to. His latest episode features the notorious Alex Jones.

Alex Jones Returns

If you were to describe a stereotypical American, it would be very close to Alex Jones. He’s loud, he always sounds angry, he speaks twice the speed of most people, he’s very arrogant & a little obnoxious…cut him open and he will spill out Red, White and Blue. He’s pretty intense, but that’s what gives him character too. I just recommend you listen to him in small doses. Too much Alex Jones would leave you a nervous wreck.

The Best In The Business

What makes Joe such a good interviewer is the way he conducts himself, all the time. Regardless of who he is up against, he’s always cool, calm and collected. He’s none judgmental and very factually accurate (there’s no guesswork; he either knows or doesn’t, and if he doesn’t then he asks) and there’s no bias either. He has his opinion, and if it’s different to that of the interviewee its just accepted.

A Lesson For Everyone

In a world where blame and shouting and offence is used before logic, it’s refreshing to hear that there are people out there (like Joe) who prove that a civil conversation can be had, even if it’s with someone that you may not necessarily like or agree with.

The Pied Piper of Everett

I don’t like to use the Lord’s name in vain, but this one is deserving…God damn you, Brian Mariotti. No matter how hard I try to step away from Funko (pops in particular) he just keeps on tempting me in like the (wonderfully) geeky Pied Piper he is.

I’ve never met the man (almost certainly never will) but from what I’ve read, heard and seen of him he sounds like one of the most down to earth, chilled out, cool guys in the world. But God damn him (sorry Lord) for FINALLY getting The Office pops sorted. Of all the franchises & licences to REALLY get me in…its The Office.

Despite being a Brit, and a huge Ricky Gervais fan, The Office (US) is hands down the greatest TV show ever made. I can watch that show from start to finish and back again. Never gets boring, never gets old. One thing that does frustrate me though is the lack of merch. To be fair, why would there be (especially in the UK) But still, one could dream…

Ever since I was aware of Funko Pops (The Walking Dead: Bicycle Girl Zombie from 2012 being the very first one) I knew I wanted The Office characters in that form. Not only is there a Stella ‘regular’ main cast, but they each also have a plethora of alternate ‘versions of themselves too (Belsnickel and Recyclops anyone?) the possibilities are endless, and now, thanks to Brian Mariotti, my wishes are fulfilled…and my wallet is now empty (even before I started)

God damn your Brian Mariotti, God damn you indeed.

Detective Pikachu Trailer 2, Thoughts

One of the joys of being an ‘old man’ (I’m 36, but the ‘yoof’ of today make me feel MUCH older) is being able to say ‘I’ve been a fan since day one’ (it’s a weird bragging right, but I’m having it) and being a fan of Pokemon since day one is one such claim. This film is beyond how I can explain…but ill give it a go.

If you are of a similar age then you probably grew up watching some TERRIBLE ‘game to film’ adaptations. Mario, Street Fighter, all the way up to Resident Evil. Video games have just never been able to make it in film format. Which just baffles me because games these days (more ‘old man’ talk there) are full of movie moments. As much as I enjoyed the always brilliant Duncan Jones foray into The World of Warcraft it just didn’t hit the mark for me. That was the last video game film I saw, and I never thought it would be beaten…until now.

This film (Detective Pikachu) has THE most realistic (and in proportion) looking Pokemon we ever could have wished for. It’s so earnest. They look terrifying and cute and even better than I ever could have imagined! I just…honestly, words fail me. I thought I was passed the age of ‘the magic of the movies’ and the ‘cinema experience’ but this trailer makes me feel like a kid all over again. I’m excited, I’m full of anticipation… I seriously just cannot wait.

What’s even better than all this is the fact that I get to witness it all with my daughter. We don’t go to the cinema that often as there aren’t many films that capture her imagination, but she’s super excited about this one. I get to see, first hand, her face light up when she gazes at the screen in awe of these ultra-realistic creatures, that have, until now, been nothing more than pixels on a DS or cute and loveable looking characters in cartoon format. I will not only get to relive my youth but also share this magical moment with my daughter. THAT, for me, is why this trailer (& film) is going to be one to watch over, and over again.

Jablinski ‘Games’

I love Jables. I was there for the birth of Tenacious D, and have followed his film career since I Still Know What You Did Last Summer. But his latest venture really winds me up. Here’s why.

First off, let’s start with the obvious. The issue that winds people up the most is the fact that he claims to be a gaming channel. Again, I know it’s an obvious and easy criticism, but it’s true. He isn’t a gaming creator. Yeah, he’s mentioned Ninja and Pewds. He did the fake Fortnite footage and the Pinball machine ‘tour’ video, but that’s it. It’s not gaming as we know it, or expect it to be. Call it what it is, a weekly vlog channel. It’s cool, we’re ok with your content (I am at least) just don’t claim to be a gaming channel. WWE’s Xavier Woods (Up Up Down Down) is a gaming channel, yours, is not.

Secondly is the unfair push he gets from Youtube. His content is watchable, I’m not denying this, but there are so many tiny channels out there who are super creative and original (shout out to my personal favourite DOPLEX ) who don’t get anywhere near the attention they deserve because YouTube (& other media sources) would rather push a well-known celeb. Again, his content is watchable, I just feel like other channels are more deserving of a subscriber.

As with most things in life, it is what it is. I can’t change it…but I CAN try & help. So if you’re reading this, give some love to the smaller, more creative channels too, and not just the ‘A’ list celebs. Share the love and let other people know YOUR favourite artists. Don’t just stop with YouTube either. Writers, animators, singers, let’s give some love to the underdogs and make the world a more original & creative place.

Or don’t. It’s your call. But I know I would.

In fact, I just did, so…

A Snippet Into Billie’s mind – bury a friend. Thoughts

I’m fairly new to the world of Billie Eilish. To be fair, she’s 17 years old. I’m not exactly her target audience. However, on watching this I will definitely be keeping a track of her career.

At first glance, you might mistake her for just being a ‘moody’ teenager trying to express herself in ‘new ways’ (we’re all guilty of judging a book by its cover) but when you actually take the time to listen to her…she is WAY beyond her years! So fresh and intelligent and creative and new. She is amazing.

The way she ‘writes’ a song (or at least this one in particular) by drawing how she ‘feels it sounds’ is so next level. In one part she even goes to the dentist for a procedure and records the sound of a high speed whizzing away and not only uses THAT in the song…but it works too!

Honestly, before you actually listen to any of her songs or watch any of her videos, I highly recommend you watch this first to truly appreciate how diverse and creative she is. She will blow your mind.

Click here for the video.