I have this itch I just can’t scratch when it come to YouTube. Like, I want to make videos, but I just don’t have the equipment, software or editing skills to do something ‘good’. I say ‘good’ because there’s a lot of competition. But, I thought…bugger it. It’s for my own personal creative pleasure anyway, so why not.
Armed with my Motorola e5 play & Vlog Star I thought I’d give it a go…and here it is.
Enjoy!
Being a ‘poor & starving artist’ a lot of…ALL of my video gaming is done ‘retro’ (I hate using that term on a machine that came out in the 2000s, but apparently that’s where we’re at) I don’t have a problem with gaming on a budget (hunting down seventh gen games in charity shops is one of my most favourite things to do) but just because it won ‘Game of the Year’ or scored high on Metacritic doesn’t mean I will personally enjoy it…
When the Wii first came out, the motion control was seen as (& probably ACTUALLY) groundbreaking. It was revolutionary…and a gimmick. The latter being the problem. I don’t mind a mini-game that requires a bit of tilting and shaking and ‘wand pointing’, but a full game? Maybe it’s just me, or maybe it just hasn’t aged well. Most probably, it’s both, because playing this game sucked.
Before I get all negative Nancy, there are some things I enjoyed about it. The art is phenomenal (using many different styles) and the story has a real Disney/Mickey feel to it; it’s a magical adventure that slightly (and I mean slightly) takes me back to Castle of Illusion (legitimately one of the greatest games ever made) there are lots of things to collect and places to explore too. It’s a shame it handles so poorly…
Simply put, it’s the gosh darn controls! If I’m not fiddling about with the lord awful camera (trying to get a decent angle while moving was near impossible, I literally had to stop, adjust the camera and THEN move) I was faffing about trying to get close enough to the items I needed to paint or thin (even trying to remember which was which was a tricky task at first, but that’s probably being more down to me)
I like my games to be, not necessarily fast action, but definitely smooth flowing. This was neither. As mentioned above, I would have to stop and position myself all too often before jumping or painting. It was a chore to play that literally left me with achy hands! (But again, that could just be me)
Was it good back in 2010 (NINE whole years ago!) We’ll according to IGN, yes (it was a ‘best of E3 2010 winner) but does it hold up now? For me…not at all. I would have loved to have played it back in the day to see how it felt back then, but we’ve come so far in the last 9 years or just simply doesn’t hold up in today’s market.
But what do you think? I’d love to hear your thoughts (good or bad)
Jo
Number 1 of 6 (mini series)
November 1987
Have you ever started to read a comic (or book) and the words just don’t seem to sink in? Like, you’re saying the words…but they’re just words. They’re not conjuring up any imagery, they’re not making any sense…they’re just words. This is exactly what I’ve just encountered with this comic book. I’m actually lost for words at how bad it is.
The story… I couldn’t even tell you what the story is! I even went on a Wiki and nobody has filled it in there either! I don’t know the year, the place (i assume its an alternative dimension or alien planet, given that there is a mixture of humans, dinosaurs and aliens all living together) I don’t understand what the hero is doing…I just started to gaze off in confusion. Has anyone else done that? Or is it just me and my short attention span?
I don’t wish to be rude to the writer (I’m all about positivity & spreading the love) but yeah…this (in my opinion) was just terrible. I couldn’t get into it, didn’t understand what was going on…absolute mind melter.
Maybe you have read it and can tell me what’s going on. If so, let me know! I’m also intrigued to know whether anyone else has an attention span as short as mine. If a story doesn’t instantly grab my attention, then I just don’t see the point of carrying on. Harsh I’m sure, but that’s what you’re dealing with people.
Here’s hoping next weeks comic book picks are better.
Until then!
Jo
In case you weren’t aware, today (March 7th 2019) is World book day. A day where we actively promote reading and really push literature. Children get to dress up as their favourite fictional characters and tell each other about their favourite stories and adults…well, should attempt to read at least one book. But life is hectic and finding time to sit down to do so is hard. You REALLY have to consciously make the effort. Even I struggled to read as much as I wanted to. But what I DO want to do is tell you all about MY favourite book. So if you struggle to delve into a book today, read this instead! It’s practically the same thing…honest!
As stated, he lands the role and finds a place to stay close by. He also makes 2 new friends who are also there for the summer (Tom & Erin) the role in question is being the boy behind the mask (or costume in this instance) of the park mascot; Howie. He also works with longtime park employee Lane Hardy. Another key character in this intriguing story.
One day, while dressed as Howie, Devin saves a young girls life. She happens to be wearing a red hat. This gives the park some much needed positive publicity and also gives Devin the trust and appreciation of the park owner Mr Easterbrook.
As the story unfolds, so does the mystery of Joyland. Devin and co learn that, years prior, a girl had been murdered in the haunted house and her ghost is said to still haunt the ride today. Devin’s friend, Tom, sees the ghost, but Devin doesn’t, but he does become interested in the murder. He teams up with Erin who shows him pictures and articles, proving that it was in fact only one of many unsolved murders. Murders which had never been connected together by the police
Despite the summer being over with, Devin decides to take a year off from school and stay at the park during the offseason. During this time he becomes close to a woman (Annie) and her sick son (Mike) who he passes by daily on the beach…they also have a pet dog! Mike tells Devin that he too has seen the ghost which prompts Devin to realize that Mike is the second child in the fortune teller’s prediction. Devin convinces Mr Eastbrook to let Mike have a private tour of the park as he feels it will give it some more much-needed publicity. It also helps that he is on good books too.
During this tour…well, I really don’t want to continue! The final part of the book is SO good, and I really couldn’t do it justice. It’s got a nice twist to it, it delves in deep to the backstory of a character, there’s action… it’s genuinely a phenomenal read. It might not be what you think when you think of Stephen King, but trust me, its some of his best work (in my opinion) you really won’t be disappointed.
If you do end up reading it, let me know, of love to hear what you think of it. And if you have read it already, and can suggest a similar story for me to look at, please let me know!
Jo
One of my favourite Podcasts to listen to is called Films to be Buried With in which artists, actors & musicians are asked film-related questions that tell the story of their life. It really is fascinating stuff, and that in part is down to the host Brett Goldstein. Obviously, the answers are more in-depth on the podcast and there is back and forth between guest and host…but I thought I’d give it a go myself. So sit back, relax and when you’ve finished reading mine, head on over to your favourite Podcast provider and give the real deal a listen to here.
My mum always told me she took me to see The Care Bears Movie when I was tiny…but I fell asleep during it apparently, and I certainly don’t remember seeing it (I would have been 2 years old) But what I do remember vividly (back when Dewsbury had a cinema) was going to see The Little Mermaid and Indian Jones. Based on the dates they where released, it would have been Indiana Jones. Though I definitely enjoy The Little Mermaid more, which says a lot about me.
Now, like most of these questions I think you have to take the time and your age into consideration (when answering them) I was 16 when The Blair Witch Project came out and I remember telling my dad that (I read in The Daily Mirror) audiences in America where running out of the cinema absolutely terrified because they didn’t know if it was real or not, and it was scary as hell. Guess what? it WAS scary as hell! That last scene (again, 16/17 years old) where he’s just stood against a wall and then she drops and the camera drops and continues to roll, and you STILL don’t know if it’s real or not. Terrifying!
There is a long list of films for this (I’m not shy when it comes to expressing myself) but Inside Out just kills me. I don’t want my babies to grow up. I don’t want these magical days to end. It’s so beautiful and so sad…and it’s inevitable. Brilliant storytelling & a legitimate classic in my books.
Easy…Freddy Got Fingered! 18 years later and I STILL quote it! ‘got my fingers crossed! Hope I get a jobby’. It’s SO dumb and Tom Green is at his height of ridiculous, it’s just amazing. Even now in 2019. Well, at least I think so.
Another easy one (& ironically features Tom Green again!) Road Trip. I literally watched it at the end of last year and it’s just awful! It would not be made in 2019 that’s for sure! (Sexism being the key crime) it’s creepy, it’s not funny, it’s just awful.
Tough one this, because a lot of my happy memories have been shattered. My wife and I had a Labyrinth ‘themed’ wedding as we are both huge Bowie fans (& that film is easily top 3 of all time) but sadly, we are no longer together.
Again, super easy because I was the perfect target audience at the time…American Pie 2. That lesbian scene…say no more! What’s interesting is, that film still holds up. I know I berated Road Trip for being sexist and dumb, but the writing & characters in this are way better written. It also plays both ways; if you remember the scene in question you’ll remember that the boys have to show that they are willing too, and in the end, Stifler becomes comfortable with his own sexuality. So as dumb and as sexist as it seems, it actually delving feeling into the characters (especially the men) & getting them to open up & question love, life and sexuality.
Into the wild. It’s based on a true story in which Christopher McCandles just wants to escape the stress & BS of life. He wants to live off the grid, and just live alone in the middle of nowhere. It’s SUCH a good film, and the fact that it’s true (ending with an actual photo of him before he died) blows my mind. I suffer with anxiety and depression & intrusive thoughts, I know exactly what it feels like to want to disappear. If you haven’t seen it, go do so now. You won’t be disappointed.
I think I’d say Shawshank Redemption. The story, characters, the vibe of the film…everything about it is just perfect. I’ve never met a single person who thinks it’s a crap film. Can’t say more than that really because I can’t think of anyone under the age of 20 who hasn’t seen it. It’s a masterpiece (especially when he is escaping to the ‘sound’ of thunder and lighting) a visually stunning film too.
Another easy one…Labyrinth. It was my childhood, my wedding was based on it and even Layla (my 6-year-old daughter) loves it. Never get tired of watching it or singing along. Most definitely the most watched by a country mile.
A friend and I went to see the 2011 midnight release of Conan the Barbarian…dear lord almighty. Awful. What a letdown. There’s really not much else to say other than its well and truly forgettable.
It was a toss-up between Jackass and Bruno…but I have to give it to the latter. When he jumped out of the window after being whipped by a dominatrix…honest to god, I couldn’t breathe! It makes me laugh just thinking about it! So much cringe and shock. Amazing.
Massive props to Brett for creating such a wonderful show. Please go check it out for yourself, and maybe give some o your own answers in the comments.
Jo
Volume 1
Issue 7
March 1998
Peter Parker is in school trying to complete a chem paper that’s due in 3 hours. He falls asleep at his desk & is woken up by his good friend Jose, the janitor. After a brief conversation (letting us know that there is some history between the two of them) Jose continues with his duties. Little does he know there is a vampire, a sun walker, hiding in the shadows. The vampire kills Jose, & Spider-man is left angry (at himself for not being able to save his friend, and also at the vampire for the murder its self)
The two of them take the fight outside where Spidey eventually gets the win just as the police turn up. He webs the vampire up and heads on home. While this is going on Blade is in the shadow watching it all unfold. He was the one who was sent to take down this Vampire, unaware that Spidey was in the area. But seeing as how he was, Blade let him do his dirty work for him. The vampire is arrested & taken to Rikers Island, only for Blade to then break him out of there and torture him on a beach until he gives up some information (the vampire cannot be killed by the sun, but he feels the pain of it as if it were killing him)
…this is when things start to get interesting…
Just after the Vampire had been experimented on (scientists working with Blade were trying to figure out what makes him different to other vampires) it turns out that he (like Blade) also has some human emotions. He reveals that in Austria, 1794 Dracula himself turned this vampire into the undead! Before that, he was Henry Sage. He had a wife and kid and Dracula took them away from him before turning him into the vampire he is today. Blade starts to empathise with this (once) man and just as we think Blade is ready to save him, Spider-man comes crashing through the window to kick both their butts.
You see, day(s?) prior, after the funeral of Jose, there was a news report telling us that a vigilante (Blade) had broken a criminal out of Rikers Island. Spidey is watching this news report and recognises Blade. He remembers Dr Strange telling him that Blade is based in New Orleans. So in order to avenge Jose’s death, Spider-man travels to New Orleans to track down both Blade & this vampire, and once again set the world to right.
Blade and Spider-man begin to battle while Sage escapes. Blade talks some sense into Spidey and they go track Sage down. They realise that Sage (the Vampire) was sent to ESU (where Peter Parker studies) to steal a special compound that was created by the Dean of the ESUs science department (this compound is what makes a Vampire a Sun walker)
Blade and Spider-man track Sage down to a graveyard. The story ends when Sage has Spider-man pinned down, ready to feast on him (as strong as Spidey is, Sage holds Spidey down as if he ‘were a baby’) Blade tries to talk him out of it but Sage won’t listen. The need to feast is all consuming and in the end, Blade takes him out and kills him before he turns Spider-man into the undead. We find out that the formula lets them walk in the sun, but it also brings back some of their humanity too.
Unsurprisingly, this was really good. I say unsurprisingly because…well its Blade and Spider-man! Two very awesome Marvel creations. The story is a little cheesy & dated at times (Peter Parker must reference The X-Files at least 3 times) and the initial conversation between Jose and Parker was clearly there to let us know the history between the two of them (making Spider-mans revenge justifiable) as well as having a final battle in a graveyard! but all in all, a great story and a very enjoyable read.
Having children brings you many wonderful moments in life. Yeah, they can be nightmarish at times and can make life stressful, but the good will always outweigh the bad. One of these wonderful moments (for me at least) is watching how my 6-year-old daughter learns, plays and grows with Youtube.
Growing up, I had 4 channels. Channel 5 came along at the end of my teens, and we were too poor for Sky or cable. So we made do with what we had (which for me was a mixture of toys, stickers & cards, and video games) and life was good (well I enjoyed for the most part) now that I have children of my own I not only get an insight into what they like but also watching them react to things I liked at their age (check out my Detective Pikachu post for an example) and one of the hot ticket items of the moment, is slime.
TMNT Retromutagen Ooze from 1989 was not only my first ‘exposure’ to slime…but it was also the best. Not only was it part of one I my all time favourite franchises (the TMNT) but it also came with a tiny glow in the dark pre-evolved turtle! It was amazing. Thinking about it now takes me straight back to shopping for it with my mum in Woolworths in Dewsbury (West Yorkshire) we had so many of those canisters growing up, they were an integral part of playing with our other toys. Fast forward 30 years later and my daughter is enjoying the exact same thing! Only this time, there’s a slight ‘twist’ to what she plays with.
For whatever reason, (& it really is beyond me) children of today are OBSESSED with poo related toys. Seriously, it is EVERYWHERE. Some of the biggest play creation toy manufacturers in the world have poo related toys. Make your own poo, poo based board games, poo emoji cushions, you cannot escape it. It is everywhere. And the biggest ‘culprit’ of them all? Poo slime. That’s right, slime that is pretending to be the excrement of some magical mystical animal. I don’t get it, but it clearly works, so why not. The question is though…is it any good?
The answer (I’ve found) is, yes! But only from one specific company. In my 36 years of living (& being a man child) I’ve played with my fair share of slime. Ecto-Plazm, Gak, Silly Putty and a whole host of knock-off brands, but there is one company out of all of these that has well and truly hit the nail on the head when it comes to branding, fun and slime consistency. That company is HGL.
Last weekend my daughter brought home a small tub of unicorn poo (yes, you read that correctly) the container of which is a couple of cms thick with the circumference being just a little smaller than the base of a coffee mug. Inside was this creamy white slime…full of glitter (her mind exploded when she saw it was glitter, but why wouldn’t it be, its unicorn poo) as soon a she got it out, hand to God, she had it with her all day. If she wasn’t playing with the other toys with it, she had it in her hand while she was watching TV, and fiddling around with it while she was reading to me. It did not leave he sight. When she eventually went to sleep, I finally got my hands on it (to see what all the fuss was about) and I was amazed at what I found.
To get the full effect of it I placed it back in its tub for a bit to cool down and to reshape (she had been playing with it so much it was warm from her touch!) But when I did get my hands on it…my word, it was the real deal. The consistency is spot on; not too runny like a Mattel slime, and not to moldable like Silly Putty. They well and truly hit that sweet spot. The colour is mesmerizing (especially with the hint of glitter) the packaging and gimmick are cheesy but perfect for the target audience. It also plays well with other toys (I used an action figure and some lego and it didn’t leave any mess or residue behind) and when you put it all back in its little tub, it all folds back perfectly into a smooth ‘new’ consistency (after a while)
If you’re buying slime for your children, ignore the fact that it’s ‘poo’ (I know some parents are put off by this, lord knows why, but some are) just buy this stuff. It’s a great price point (I paid £1 for each of these tubs, yes, I have my own now) and it will give your child hours of fun, with very minimal mess (as long as they are using it properly) it also works well as a relaxation tool too! I use mine all the time when I’m just sat watching TV. Open up your inner child. It’s way more fun than you imagine.
Jo
The Baxter Report 